Why is everyone else having fun

The other day I looked on Facebook to see if I could find some inspiration for a great blog post. As I scrolled down the newsfeed, a sudden thought flashed across my mind. Why is everyone else having fun? I saw former colleagues on a night out, having a great time. Then I saw an old school friend on a great looking adventure. Another old school friend looking like he is doing really well financially. Then there was a good friend doing really well in his career. Happy smiley faces – why they are all having fun … and not me?
“… and not me?”

Halt.
Rewind.

My psychological training and self-hypnosis kicks in and I catch myself. I mentally rewind. I replay the mental movie again. This time I mentally congratulate each of my friends. Then I Like, Like, Like.

What Happened There?

For a moment I let the immature part of my psyche take over and instead of seeing joy and abundance out there in the world, I focused on scarcity.
You see it’s not Facebook’s fault. It was mine. People only put their highlights up. They don’t put the mundane stuff up. Imagine if they did, it would be boring.

It’s the same with Celebrities, when we compare ourselves to them. We don’t see the years of practice they put in behind the scenes to hone their skills. Also, we don’t see the hours they spend in makeup. We don’t see the monotonous work they put in at the gym. When they are at their worst we definitely don’t see them. We only see the results and only the results they want us to see.
Just as your life is not all boring, they aren’t having fun all the time. In fact, I’ll let you into a secret, towards the end of this section.

How to be happy and successful.

Have faith and hope

Affirmations and visualisation can help. Sometimes you may need to change your beliefs. This can take time, but is well worth it. Hypnosis can also help.

Action towards a goal – consistency

Having some sort of goal to work towards helps in happiness. Humans are goal-seeking creatures; we need something to aim for.

Enjoy the process

As I said, it’s important to have a worthy goal to aim for. However, it’s important to enjoy the process of moving towards that goal. Fall in love with the process and you will move effortlessly towards the goal.
Get out of your head and live in the now. If you try to live in the now, you automatically focus on what is around you now this moment.

Congratulate other people.

Going back to our Facebook friends. How about sincerely congratulating them on their successes? Will this make you have more fun or be successful? Maybe, maybe not, but it will make you happier.

Gratitude

Finally have gratitude. I strongly recommend keeping a morning gratitude journal. I have some set questions that I write at least two answers to, every single day. This forces me to focus on what’s good in my life. This then sets the tone for the day. Here are some of the questions I ask myself every morning:

1. What was great about yesterday?
2. What am I grateful for in my life right now?
3. I Think about what am I really excited about today and in the future?
4. What do I appreciate about the people I love?

How could doing all this make you more happy and successful?
First, it changes your immediate mood. Then as you repeat it and it becomes a habit, your outlook on life will start to change. As your outlook changes, you become more positive and confident. You try things you might not have done. You make braver decisions. This is when you start to see tangible results in your life.

Then you might find that people look at you and say how lucky you are.
So getting back to that little secret I mentioned before, your friends on Facebook are jealous of you. Think about that. Have you ever put up a post with pictures of your life highlights, like the Night out with friends or the family reunion? Someone somewhere will look at that and envy you.

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